Father Barron comments on marriage and relationships.

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I love this idea of marriage.


Ladies, come on, really? And men too.

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Not long ago there was a conversation on Facebook that took place about this song by Toby Keith.  The guy who posted the song prefaced it by saying what a great song it was and he didn’t care who you were, the lyrics were FABULOUS and you had to love it!  So of course this caught my attention because like any lover of music I’m all for hearing a “fabulous” song.  So I listened, even though I’m not much for country or Toby Keith for that matter.  It didn’t take me long to know that I didn’t like the song and to know, exactly why, I didn’t like the song.  Number one, simply because it’s just a bad country song.   Number two and probably the most important reason was because of the lyrics.  Which he had just got done claiming were FABULOUS…  Now, I don’t consider myself a prude by any means but the guy who posted this song AND several of his “girl” (and guy) friends would have had you thinking otherwise.  Just because I didn’t agree with his assessment of the lyrics and voiced my opinion about the song in a much condensed version than this.  If you actually listen to the words of the song though, he is singing about date rape, or the threat of it.  He is trying to force a woman to have sex with him because he has “put in his time” she owes him at least that much.  I mean come on, “Girl, you drank all my beer and the whiskeys all gone” and he took her dancing and she even had the nerve to kiss him… ”  we’ve already come this far get out of your clothes or GET OUT OF MY CAR”.  (Mmm yeah, that is a real Prince Charming right there).   He threatens to kick her out of the car if she doesn’t “put out”, it really doesn’t matter to him, NOW he has made it abundantly clear that he doesn’t care about her as a person he just took her out hoping to get lucky.  The song doesn’t tell you where in the geographical world they are but you can imagine that they went parking somewhere in the country, a young girl who drank too much, who is out with some guy who she thought was nice, who is now being threatened by a sexual predator.   “Either you sleep with me or I’ll dump you off here.   Either you have sex with me and pay me back for all I’ve done for you tonight (insert eye roll here) or just get out of my car because I’ve wasted too much time on you already.”  They could be out in the middle of nowhere, or in a strange city, no way for her to get home,  I know all this is a hypothetical situation but what if that was your daughter or sister or even mother he was singing about?   These situations actually do happen all too often.  This is not the kind of “man” I’d want my daughter to run into anywhere, I wouldn’t want them dating, I wouldn’t want them to be friends, I wouldn’t want her dreaming about or singing to or idolizing or having her first intimate encounter with.

Now the really sad part is a couple of his lady Facebook “Friends” who had jumped in on that conversation attacked me personally and defended this song and it’s lyrics.  They loved this song.  I only had to look at their profile pictures to get my first impression and to understand why they attacked.  No judgment intended here, seriously but I think it kind of adds to my point.  You don’t put up a profile picture of yourself in a string bikini or a low-cut shirt with all your cleavage showing, because you DON’T want that kind of attention from men or (insert intended audience).   To them, I was just an under sexed prude who wouldn’t know how to please my man even if I landed…well you get the gist of what they were saying.  There was no intelligent debate, it was an immediate attack against me as a “real woman”.  I must not be a real woman if I don’t let men degrade me or objectify me.  I must not be a  real woman because I care enough about all women, even those who degrade themselves to speak up when I think something like this song is wrong.  I am not going to go into all the specifics of my sex life because it’s no ones business but lets just say, 17 years going strong and only getting better, we do just fine ;-).  It sounds cliché but I’ll still say it, marriage is like a fine wine, it only gets better with age.  Love, communication and mutual respect between a married couple is a level of intimacy that cannot be had or reached by mere one night stands.  Sorry, I know you think you’ve found the ultimate sexual experience but I can tell you, you haven’t.   I’ve been to your side, you haven’t been to mine.  You may think its nice to be free to roam about the population but the sad thing is what you’re searching for you will never find.  Ladies, how can you expect men to give you any respect if you don’t respect yourselves and demand it from them all the time? 

Maybe common sense does come with age and being a parent and actually wanting to be a part of something other than yourself. 

My question to those women who would like this song and excuse it as “just a song” is, why would you celebrate a man and a song who degrades women like this?  What is it about this song do you like?  Can you tell me something specific I may be missing?  I mean if you are claiming to be a strong independent woman this is definitely not a song I would claim as my “fight song”, my “proud anthem”, I am woman hear me {{{{ROOAARRrrr}}}}..er…wait…what?

The point I am trying to make is it’s not just a song.  It is a societal and familial attitude that keeps getting passed on down through the generations from father to son, like a cancer growth and as I’ve described, sadly in women too who don’t stick up for themselves and allow the name calling and songs and general attitudes like this to continue unchecked.   What you are really saying is its OK for them to treat you as an object.  You do realize what happens when women get treated like they are objects?  They get beaten, raped, murdered and thrown away like yesterdays garbage.  You might say, I am over reacting or if you don’t like the music I don’t have to listen to it.  Well, yes and no.  It’s not just about the music though, it’s about the attitude behind it.  It’s also in movies and bars and the work place and in everyday life.  Yes, I won’t listen to the song if it offends me.  But then no there are people out there who keep on sweeping what they think are “minor issues” like being objectified, under the rug, when in reality those “minor issues” explode into things like domestic violence, rape and murder and they will all continue to happen and get worse and that is when I Do have to listen and to deal with it.  That’s when it does affect me and my life.  And I have to wonder why this is happening and what I can do to try to fix or prevent the ever-growing problem.  When I have to get you in the back of my Ambulance and in my ER and take care of you after you have been beaten and abused all because of the desensitized attitudes of  “IT’S JUST A SONG”.

Now, I am not just attacking Toby Keith or country, because I love Rock n Roll (of Sex and Drugs).  Good Ole Classic Rock.  And I have to say I absolutely cannot listen to some of my “old favs” any more, at least not without making me cringe before I just turn it off.  Now that I have actually realized what some of the lyrics are actually saying (even though I had every word memorized),  I am like, is that what I’ve sung about all these years!!!???!!!  I guess I AM becoming a prude in a way.  Although I am not really sure what that means.  If it means I’m not OK with women being treated with disrespect or as sex objects, even if they are, then I’m OK with that.  If it means I am changing into a different mindset than what I used to have as an immature child, then I’m OK with that.  If it means I am doing everything in my power to teach my son to be the best man that he can be, even if he falls and makes mistakes like I did so many times, then I’m OK with that.  If it means I lose a few friends along the way, I guess they weren’t really mine to begin with, Christ  said “come follow me” and that’s what I’m trying to do…Then I’m OK with that too.

I hope I didn’t offend anyone that was not my intention. 



Wisconsin woman suing lover for allegedly giving her herpes.

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I really don’t have much to say about this one it’s painfully self-explanatory.     I’m verclempt…discuss.


Atheist Group Wants WTC Cross Removed

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I am really growing tired of these atheist groups.

“Equality is an all-or-nothing deal,” Silverman, the president of the atheists, said in a statement.

Apparently he only means this only for atheists, I don’t think he really believes that statement when it applies to anything Christian.  It may sound good when you’re spouting it for your own agenda but it doesn’t apply to Christianity, does it?  You want to be equally represented?  How can that be when your belief is in NOTHING.  What would you have stand in representation of your beliefs, a big  of nothingness?

You can sit it right next to our CROSS of FAITH and HOPE   .


Really the point of the museum is to accurately remember all those who died and to have a little piece of history preserved.  To help those of us who were left behind find some comfort.  That cross was not constructed specifically for the museum.  It was the only thing left standing in the rubble after the attacks, I could say it was happenstance,  But I don’t believe in coincidence, not on a level such as this.  It gave hope to millions and it is as much a part of the towers as the almost 3000 people who died there that day.  It’s a part of our history and it belongs in that museum.   In this case it isn’t even about the Christian faith.  It is about the hope that the symbol gave to all those people during a time when all hope seemed lost.

If it offends you as an atheist to even look at a cross then may I suggest just one simple thing….. DON’T LOOK!!!





Tomb of St. Philip the Apostle discovered in Turkey’s Denizli

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Can you Imagine?  An original follower of Jesus, one of the 12.  I just think that is amazing.  I don’t need this evidence or proof but some people do, even believers.   I think of these amazing finds as little “extra” gifts from God, (as if he hasn’t given enough) to show us yes you are right in choosing me, I AM, and you are my child.




So Long Self

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I was listening to this song  on the way to work singing along to the words when the meaning of them really hit me.  I mean here he is, the lead singer of Mercy Me, singing this happy tune about leaving his old self in the past.  As I was casually singing this happy tune the reality of  how hard that actually is, hit me square in the face.  This is something I know I struggle with on a daily basis,  leaving the old me behind.  And I know if you are honest with yourselves it is for you as well.   But in this song he was singing along happily?  Shouldn’t he be singing a sad tune about how hard it is to leave those fun but sinful parts of our past, in the past?  It’s hard breaking up with yourself.  You are the only one who knows outside of God what is going on in that mind of yours.  Of the inner struggle you have letting go of those more sinful parts or people.  I think we can all visualize something in our lives we are or have had trouble getting past.  I guess really sometimes it feels like more of a burden to give up those things, doesn’t it?   We always want to hold on to (just a little piece, God) what can it hurt?  Right?  Well, I guess that depends on how deep you want to take your relationship with Christ.  How far you want to let him into your heart and refine you like Gold.

My relationship with Christ is like any other only in that it has to be nurtured and maintained daily.  I can’t just accept Christ and then forget him.  Because that is what I’ll do…Forget him.  I have to stay diligent and read his word, daily.   Stay in constant communication, daily.   Come together with other like-minded believers in the miracle of the Eucharist, Christ’s Flesh and Blood.

If there is always something from your past your holding onto, like a fish on a hook, you’ll eventually be yanked back into your old ways.

So for today…So Long Self.


Well if I come across a little bit distant
It’s just because I am
Things just seem to feel a little bit different
You understand
Believe it or not but life is not apparently
About me anyways
But I have met the One who really is worthy
So let me say

So long, self
Well, it’s been fun, but I have found somebody else
So long, self
There’s just no room for two
So you are gonna have to move
So long, self
Don’t take this wrong but you are wrong for me, farewell
Oh well, goodbye, don’t cry
So long, self

Stop right there because I know what you’re thinking
But no we can’t be friends
And even though I know your heart is breaking
This has to end
And come to think of it the blame for all of this
Simply falls on me
For wanting something more in life than all of this
Can’t you see

Don’t feel so bad (don’t feel so bad)
There’ll be better days (there’ll be better days)
Don’t go away mad (but by all means)
Just go away, go away

Mercy Me



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